Pinball FX2

Do you have fond memories of those smoky arcades back in the '70s? Where rock music blasted through the overhead speakers, pinball machines were lined up one right next to the other, so close that you were almost holding hands with the guy playing the machine next to you? The thumping sound every time you pressed the flipper button? The "ding ding ding" when your ball kept hitting the bumpers?

Yeah, I don't either.

No, I'm kidding, though by the time I was of the age to go into an arcade like this, I was usually more interested in the video games than the pinball machines.

I played my fair share, though.

Pinball FX2, an Xbox Live downloadable game on the Xbox 360, definitely helps bring that feeling back.

(Thanks to RunDLC)

And my review of it is here, on the new site I'm blogging for.

Check it out and let me know what you think! If you're a pinball fan, you have to buy this.

You Don't Know Jack is on the iPhone/iPad!

I know that many of my readers have iPhones or iPads, and they love to play games on them. Who wouldn't?

For those trivia buffs out there, one of the best console/PC video trivia games has just come out for both devices. You Don't Know Jack has arrived!

The format of the game is that of a fictional game show, hosted by the ever-irreverent Cookie Masterson (voiced by Tom Gottlieb), and you are playing for lots of money. The faster you answer each question, the more money you get (or lose, if you get it wrong). There are also question variations, such as "Dis or Dat", where you're given seven names and you have to choose if the name is one category or another (as pictured above). Each game consists of three rounds, two 5-question rounds and then a "Jack Attack," where you can win big money. The object is...wait for it...to win the most money!

I reviewed the console version of the game on my Video Game Revue blog (check it out if you like video games!). This is a bit stripped down compared to the consoles, but surprisingly not as much as you would think.

First, there is no multiplayer, which is the mainstay of the console games. I guess it might be difficult to do over a 3G network, though. I don't know. I hope they're able to implement it at some point.

Secondly, there is no "Wrong Answer of the Game." In the console version, each episode is sponsored by some wacky product (banana toaster, anyone?). One wrong answer in the episode goes along with that product in some way. If you choose it, then instead of losing money, you gain big bucks! That's not in the Apple OS version.

Each episode is self-contained, meaning you will never see those questions again unless you play the same episode. No repeats! That's been a major problem in video trivia games for many years.

With twenty brand new episodes, completely different from the console/PC version, how can you go wrong? Especially when the questions are so timely? A Rebecca Black question? A question about Elizabeth Taylor's death? Am I asking too many questions? This is a game full of questions, so how can I be?

More episodes are promised as well.

At $2.99 ($4.99 for the iPad version), this game is a steal!

And it's hilariously fun to play.

We now return you to our regular, non-video game blog.

New Video Game Blog

And it's mine!

Yes, I have heard the feedback. It's amazing, though. I love video games so much, and yet hardly any of my fans on this blog actually like them, or at least like reading about them. The video game posts on here have gone over like a lead balloon, at least for the most part.

Mainly for that reason, I'm now moving most video game posts, and all video game reviews, to my new blog, Dave's Video Game Revue. I will probably, at least for the near future, cross-post those reviews to Game Informer Online, but I won't be posting them here any more.

That doesn't mean there won't be any mention of video games here, of course. If there's something similar to my last two posts (Kinect in the Operating Room and Nintendo DS in the Arts Class), they will go here.

But a game review? Or talking about a video game issue? That will go over there instead.

I've copied the game reviews that I've posted here over to there so I have some starting content. They include bBattlefield: Bad Company 2, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, Comic Jumper and more.

So hopefully I won't hear any more "I don't read your video game posts" comments, since they won't be here to be not read.

But for those of you who are interested, I hope you check it out.

And go ahead and follow it too. You can follow most of the same procedures that you can use to follow this blog.

Surgeons using Xbox in the Operating Room

That's what one hospital in Toronto is doing, anyway, on a limited trial basis.

According to The Edge, Sunnybrook hospital in Toronto has begun using a hacked version of the Xbox motion-control device called Kinect to make surgeries more efficient, and potentially more beneficial to their patients.

For those of you who don't know (and many of my regular readers don't), Kinect is an Xbox peripheral where *you* are the controller. The system has a camera that tracks your movements, allowing it to process what you're doing and put it into the game. Unlike the Wii and the Playstation Move, you're not holding anything. The camera is reading *you*, not what's in your hand.

(Here's the device itself)

(Here it is in action)

It's an awesome piece of technology, and people have come up with a number of cool modifications to the system to do things like make 3-D maps of their rooms and stuff like that.

It was only a matter of time before people adapted it for other, more useful things.

"The Winnipeg Free Press reports that surgeons at Sunnybrook Hospital are using open-source Kinect drivers for PC to allow them to manipulate images of medical scans – something which normally involves a meticulous cleanup operation to ensure sterility around the patient, taking around 20 minutes each time.

Dr. Calvin Law, a surgical oncologist who helped integrate the system at the hospital, said checking of images often added an hour to surgical procedures. Using hand gestures to call up, rotate and zoom in on images, Law believes surgeons can be more precise in saving, for example, healthy tissue when removing a tumour, as well as saving time."

According to the paper, they've used the modified Kinect for six surgeries so far, and hope to make it a hospital-wide procedure soon.

Is this cool, or what? They're already doing remote surgeries where the surgeon doesn't even have to be in the room. While this does require the surgeon to be present, it's amazing that they can save time like this. The less time you're under the knife and under anesthesia, the less time there is for something to go wrong.

And, you know, maybe some of the other people in the room can play some Dance Central if there's a particular instance where they're not needed right at that moment.



It's a win-win!

(h/t: The Official Xbox Magazine podcast, where host Ryan McCaffrey mentioned the Edge article)

Bringing the Nintendo DS to the Classroom

There has been a lot of talk about video games and children. Much of it negative. A lot of it positive too, especially in regards to how they can be learning tools.

We even talked about it on one of our podcasts.

It looks like Nintendo's branching out a bit into the educational software area, though.

According to Games Radar, Nintendo's inserting itself into the Arts classroom. (They apparently have already had a number of Wii consoles be used in gym classes for fitness).

"Nintendo has just announced a partnership with the National Art Education Association. The initiative involves selected schools throughout the US, which will receive DSi XL systems and multiple copies of the game Art Academy. Unlike most painting or drawing games, Art Academy is actually marketed as a game that can teach players real-life art techniques."

The game actually looks pretty cool.

It supposedly will help with combining colours, sketching, and things like that. This concept really works well since the DS has a stylus and a touch-sensitive screen that will let you draw and sketch with it.

Back in my day, there weren't any graphics-heavy games that were also educational, though I do remember a pretty good politics simulator and a good business one that we played in FORTRAN class (I miss Mr. Jones).

But what do you think of using video games in classrooms like this? Good idea? Thin edge of the wedge that will lead to more violent games?

Is it really that far from Art Academy to Pokemon? And then, heaven forbid, Donkey Kong Country?

God save us!!!

The Obligatory "Saucy Wii" update

After my initial post about it, were any of you chomping at the bit to pick up that "racy" new game called "We Dare?" I know I had to almost physically restrain my friend Raquel from standing in line for it when it comes out.

Sadly, it may not happen.

According to Games Radar, after the trailer was released, Ubisoft cancelled the game in the UK.

Apparently, there wasn't any problem with the 12+ age rating (and after reviewing it and thinking about it further, I can't totally disagree, as most of the "raciness" is in the minds of the players and what they do with the game). It was the trailer and the target market that caused the uproar.

Really? An uproar? I think we over here just rolled our collective eyes at it and said "this is stupid."

Is the US next? Should it be?

And should they be encouraged to cancel it by an outraged public? Or outraged investors who think that this is a waste of money and nobody will actually buy it?

For your viewing pleasure, here's the original trailer again (and I hope this actually remains available this time).



And make sure you check out the Games Radar page I linked to. It's hilariously cutting.

Also, according to Game Informer, Ubisoft has been banned from doing online ads for the game in Europe. The ads were called "misleading".

Curiouser and curiouser!

The Wii gets a little saucy - Western Society collapses

The Nintendo Wii, that family gaming platform extraordinaire, is becoming a bit more...spicy.

As is the Playstation Move, but I don't care about that. Nobody's buying it.

Ubisoft has just released a trailer for a "flirty and fun" (my quotes, not a quote from the actual press release) game called We Dare.

This is the look on my face after I got done with it.

Yes, it was that awful.

In the immortal words of kids everywhere, "Ewwwwwww, gross! Try this!"



I never thought I would say this, but "hey, playing the Wii could lead to a foursome!"

If you're a bunch of losers or something.

To quote Game Informer:

"Basically, We Dare has you performing the exact same dumb minigames as in countless other Wii titles, except this time it's supposed to be naughty because you, like, put the Wii remote in your pants or something."

Yes, if that sounds bad, that's because it is.

The game's scheduled to be released in Europe. With a 12+ rating. That's right. For ages 12 and up.

Just imagine that, you Moms out there.

Hide your Wii! Or don't let them play unsupervised.

I don't think this game is the end of society as we know it (despite the title), but I do think this is hilariously bad and silly, and I can't see *anybody* enjoying this.

Except maybe for your next Key Party.

(h/t: Games Radar)

Edit #1 (2/26/11): Apparently, this video may be unplayable in the States, or something. If you read the comments, you'll see that one of my American friends couldn't play it, but at the time of this edit, I can still play it here in Canada. She said that the Game Informer video still works, so check it out there if it won't play for you!

Edit #2 (3/11/11): Changed the video, so hopefully it can now be viewed by all

Meaty Masochism

Hi. I'm Dave, and I'm a Meat-aholic.

(Hi, Dave!!!)

No, I'm not talking about a good steak (though that is totally awesome too). I'm talking about the video game Super Meat Boy.

Not only do I love the game, but I can't stop playing it despite the fact that it continues to beat me and beat me and beat me and beat me and...well, you get the idea. Instead of saying "enough of this! I'm playing something else!", I stare at the TV screen, thumb throbbing from pushing buttons, and say "more, please?"

Yes, this is the evil person that's treating me like this. And it's wrong. So wrong. Yet it's also right. So right.

So just what the hell is Super Meat Boy, anyway?

First, in a game like this, there really isn't a "story." Much like Mario in Donkey Kong, all you need to know is that you're trying to save the princess from the mad monkey by running, climbing, jumping, etc.

In Super Meat Boy, you're Meat Boy. Yes, a piece of meat with legs. Your girlfriend, Bandage Girl, has been kidnapped by Dr. Fetus (yes, a fetus in a mechanical suit...don't ask). You go through the huge number of different levels trying to reach Bandage Girl, only to have her stolen away again every time you do so.

Super Meat Boy is a throwback, both graphically and gameplay-wise, to those old platformers in the old days. Think Mario. Think MegaMan, think...well, I didn't play a lot of platformers in my past, so I can't think of any others, but they are out there!

Your button pressing has to be precise, because one false move and you will either fall to your death or be ripped up by spinning buzzsaws. All with a kind of sickening, yet also entertaining, "squish" sound. And with lots of red flying across the screen when it happens.

(This is one of early levels, already looking insane and dangerous)

Don't worry, though. The graphics are straight out of 1989 Nintendo, so it isn't really "graphic" violence or anything like that. Besides, if a piece of raw meat was cut up by a buzzsaw, I think there would be blood!

One cool thing about Super Meat Boy is that, in addition to being a throwback graphically and gameplay-wise, it also includes a lot of classic characters that you can unlock and play as. There's Commander Video, Tim (from the game Braid, which I've heard is an awesome game as well), the Pink Knight from Castle Crashers, and a bunch more. Some of the characters you unlock by collecting a certain number of bandages scattered throughout the game world. Others, you unlock by solving their "warp zones".

The game has a number of worlds, with 20 levels in each world. If you complete the level in the recommended time, you get an "A+" rating and unlock the dark world equivalent of that level. It will be a little harder, but still manageable. All in all, I think there are something like 300 levels in the game.

Insane!!!!

And this game might drive you insane. It can be *really* difficult at times, with precision jumping and button-mashing required. You will die. A *lot*. But each level is so short, the reincarnation is instantaneous, so you never feel *too* bad when you die. It's not like some games where you do a lot of stuff and then, when you die, you have to repeat all of it. This one, you've basically wasted about 10 seconds at most.

And when you do finally complete a level?

Yep, that's the feeling you get.

Also hilarious is that, when you complete a level, the game will show you a replay of every attempt you made to complete the level. All at once. In other words, if you died 30 times, you will see 30 Meat Boys running and jumping along, all of them getting gished on a saw or falling to their doom, except the one version that finally makes it to the top.

While the game can be frustratingly difficult at times, it rarely gets to the point where you want to throw your controller at the TV. No, it just adds to your determination that you WILL BEAT THIS #$@%@%@% LEVEL before you go to bed. And when you complete the level, you just have to play the next one a couple of times...just to see what it's like before you turn the game off for bedtime.

Then, three hours later, when you finally complete *that* level, the cycle repeats itself.

I've completed 20% of the game (32% of the "light" world and 13% of the "dark" world), and I've already died 2165 times.

Yet I still keep coming back for more.

That's a sign of a good game. Though keep in mind, it's not for everybody.

Hi, I'm Dave. And I'm a Meaty Masochist.

Edit: I guess I should add that this game is available on XBox Live Arcade, PC & Mac, and (I think) the Wii as well. Not sure on the last one.

Splosion Man - Running toward greatness, one explosion at a time

I've never really been much of a "platformer" gamer. I never played the various Mario games; Donkey Kong was enjoyable at the time, but I hold no real fond memories of it other than as just one of the many coin-op games I played as a kid.

Recently, however, I've been getting into some of the more recent platforming type games. Comic Jumper kind of got me started. I've now gotten used to the frustrating aspect of playing levels again and again, learning the patterns of the jumps or enemies, trying to make that one perfect series of jumps to get to the next level. Trying, and often failing miserably. Until finally, it works!

Twisted Pixel, the creators of Comic Jumper, did another platformer last year, called Splosion Man. In Comic Jumper, you can actually "buy" a couple of extra Splosion Man levels, so after completing that game, it was almost a given that I buy this one. (Keep in mind that this is only available on Xbox Live Arcade, though, if this intrigues you)

(Looks happy, don't he?)

After finally completing the game, I'd have to say that Splosion Man is even more worth the money than Comic Jumper was, because it doesn't have the same flaws. It's a very back-to-basics platforming game with modern graphics and concepts.

There are no weapons to be horribly underpowered. It's just you jumping around, using the environments to their best advantage to move on to the next level and avoid getting killed. It's Mario on steroids, just with a different kind of jump.

Splosion Man jumps by exploding. Yes, you read that right. You push *any* of the four main buttons, and he explodes. If you're moving, he'll jump into the air in that direction. If you're against a wall, you'll push off that wall and move higher (that's how you can jump to higher levels, with some controlled wall-exploding). You can explode 3 times before wearing out. You must have contact with a platform or wall for a period of time to replenish your explosion. Either that, or exploding on top of one of the myriads versions of barrels will also rejuvenate you.

(Jumping up the walls before they contract)

The premise...ok, I'm not sure exactly what the premise is. These evil scientists did something to you, turning you into Splosion Man. But somehow you escaped, and you're trying to escape the entire complex. That's 50 levels. These scientists must be billionaires.

Hazards in the game vary from killer robots, gun turrets that will shoot you up unless you disable (i.e. explode next to and kill) the scientist controlling it), huge vats of bubbling green acid, rising water levels that you must get higher and higher to avoid, and so many others. The level design is deliciously wicked, so many kudos to Twisted Pixel for that.

What really makes the game fun, though, is the presentation. As you can see, the graphics are very bright. But there's also the sound, and Splosion Man himself. The main music sounds like it came out of some 60's party movie, but there are also different themes depending on your actions. There's a hilarious song when you pick up one of the huge donut-eating scientists to use as a gun shield (the song? "Donuts Go Nuts"). If you make it all the way through the game, there's a wonderful live-action video with a great song too, which makes watching the credits a lot easier to tolerate.

Finally, there's what Games Radar calls "a lovely, bromantic ballad written to ‘Splosion Man" called "The Splode Beneath My Splosion"



In addition to the music, there's just the overall cuteness of Splosion Man himself. If you let him rest, he'll do various things like juggle one-handed, do jumping jacks, do some head-banging action, or a number of other things. As you run from one side of a level to another, he'll sometimes hold his arms out and pretend he's an airplane coming in for a landing (even down to making the airplane sound!). He never gets visibly frustrated, no matter how many times you've killed him. He's just an all-around happy guy.

There's also just something hilariously twisted about "killing" mad scientists and having them explode into deli meat products.

(Now I'm hungry)

The levels are challenging without being too difficult. If you're an experienced platformer, you'll probably have less trouble than I did. Some of the levels involve exploding in the air again and again and again, sometimes using barrels to propel yourself onward multiple times, using extreme precision. If you don't make that jump exactly when you need to, it's very likely you'll fall into the acid and have to start over.

Thankfully, the checkpoint system is pretty forgiving. There are some sequences that you'll find yourself frustratingly repeating over and over because you keep dying, but you never have to go *too* far back. That is, unless you are playing hardcore mode (unlocked when you complete the basic game). In that mode, there are no checkpoints, and as soon as something hits you, it kills you (you can survive being shot in the basic game, for example). You still have to complete a level once you start it, or you have to do it all over again. There are no in-level saves. This can kind of get annoying when you're having so much trouble with a level that it takes you half an hour to finish it.

But that's my problem, not the game's.

In my review of Comic Jumper, I mentioned that you might want to wait until it hits the "bargain bin" on XBLA before getting it, unless you were a true fan of the genre. That definitely does not apply to Splosion Man. If you like platformers at all, and if you are an Xbox gamer, you have to get this game.

If you don't, he'll be very disappointed.

(how can you resist that face?)

Favourite Arcade Memories?

A couple of video games posts today, just to lighten the mood from a very serious week.

This is for the older folks here, though the rest of you can take part too (see below).

Many of us love video games. Some people have some very fond memories of their first console, be it SNES or PS1 or whatever.

But some of us go back even further, and remember vividly the time when the arcade was the favorite hangout for masses of kids. Back when it wasn't Chuck-E-Cheese, but Showbiz Pizza.



And back when they had video games there instead of just Skeetball and Dance Dance Revolution (or whatever the hell they have there now...do they even have a few video games?).

Back when Aladdin's Castle was king.



And Dragon's Lair was the cutting edge.



I grew up on coin-ops, playing them even more than my Atari 2600.

I have a lot of fond memories of hanging out for an hour or two at the local arcade at the mall, playing tons of different games. Dig Dug, Donkey Kong, Missile Command and Space Invaders, and so many others.

But my fondest coin-op memory is not actually from an arcade.
It's from where I worked in high school.

My senior year of high school, I worked at Ganzo's, a Mexican restaurant in Davenport, Iowa. As an aside, if you're ever in Davenport and have a hankering for Mexican food, you have to stop in there...it's delicious, and I stop in there whenever I'm home.

Anyway, there was always a couple of video games in there (still are, actually, with Galaga last time I was there), and I would go in to work sometimes an hour early and play one game in particular: Operation Wolf.



This game was so awesome, and it was one of those that would let you continue if you put another quarter in before 30 seconds was up after you lost. I played that thing almost to the end, pumping numerous dollars into it. It was really hard to stop and go to work at the allotted time, but I was a conscientious kid. I couldn't play after work because I was in high school and had to get home, but  I loved that game to death.

So what are some of your favorite arcade (or just coin-op) memories?

And so you young whipper-snappers don't feel left out, what about your favorite console memory?

Call of Duty - responsible for a baby non-boom?

I've seen a lot of Call of Duty articles recently due to the recent launch of Black Ops (I haven't read that many, but I've seen them).

There is one that did make me just stop and stare for a minute.

Did you know that Call of Duty is keeping people from having sex?

According to The Sun in the UK, that's definitely happening.

It seems that some people are so into the Call of Duty franchise that hanky panky takes second place in their mind (or even lower, if that 13-year-old idiot keeps killing you in Team Deathmatch) to playing the game. (and did I just massively date myself with that reference?)

("Look. Go away and get laid or something")

The Sun highlights two stories.

First, there is Jay & Janine Foulgar. It seems Jay is so into the game that he does stuff like disappear from weddings, only to be found playing the game in the hotel room with another wedding guest (the Sun doesn't say whether the other guest survived when he told his wife where he was). And, of course, there's the sex.

"It has affected our sex life. There have been nights when I've been waiting for Jay to come to bed then woken up at 3am to find he's still playing against a stranger on a different continent.

"Now we have Lauren, Jay has had to calm down a bit. I was over the moon when he volunteered to get up to do night feeds - until I realised why. During the night he will feed Lauren then rock her to sleep in his chair while playing the game in silence."

Sounds dedicated, don't he?

Then there's Jodie Gurney & Chris Jackson, where *she's* the one who's addicted to the game.

"He says: "Her gaming has taken up romantic time before. The moment will come for us to have some 'alone time' and I'll think she's almost finished the game. I'll give her a kiss but then she says, 'Just one more game, one more game'."

Jodie admits that she will get up in the small hours to play and puts testing her abilities ahead of going out with friends too."

Is this what it comes down to? Will there literally be *no* babies born in July 2011, due to the Black Ops release on Tuesday? Should the government do something about this? (Sorry, couldn't resist).

Should somebody sue Activision? (Don't all nod your head at once). I'm just waiting for the inevitable conspiracy theories that Activision planted this story out there in order to garner even more publicity (you know, because nobody's heard of this game). You know that some people are stupid enough to believe that.

While this is a light-hearted article about the lack of sex lives of some gamers, it does highlight a serious issue. That of game addiction. Yes, it's funny to laugh about foregoing sex to play one more game of Domination (the non-kinky version). But is putting games ahead of *any* social interactions really a good thing?

We all experience it a little bit. I've been playing Splosion Man for a while now, and the "just one more level" urge has kept me up later than I've wanted to be quite a few times. But is that any different than the "just one more chapter" feeling you get from a book? Both are signs that the game or book are very enjoyable.

In the meantime, we can laugh at the image of the look on Janine Foulgar's face when she walked into that hotel room.

"Janine, 32, says: "Call Of Duty has been like the other woman in our relationship for years."

Maybe it's time to find another guy? Maybe someone who says "Wii?" (or is that "Oui?")

(h/t: a tweet from Dan Americh at One of Swords)

Comic Jumper - Jumping from comic to comic

I wasn't sure about the new XBLA (Xbox Live Arcade) game, Comic Jumper, put out by Twisted Pixel. A quick download of the trail version, however, quickly put that uneasiness to rest. It was funny, had some good side-scrolling action, and gave me that old-style arcade game feel (except updated).

Twelve hundred Microsoft Points for this? That doesn't seem too bad. I quickly plunked down the credit card (ok, I just hit "purchase points" on the Xbox Live, but let me take a little creative license) and bought it.

Now that I'm finished with it, I'm of two minds. I'm glad I bought it, but I think if I had to do it over again, I would wait until it comes down in price or hits the "Xbox Live Deals of the Week" bin.

Let's get the story out of the way first.

You play as Captain Smiley, hero of your own comic book.

Except that everything's going wrong, interest in your comic has waned to the point of non-existence, and you've been cancelled. In order to build up the funds for a resurgence, you have to guest start in a few other comics to rekindle your popularity. Sounds simple, eh? That big star on your chest is Star, your wise-cracking sidekick who happens to have a man-crush on your arch-nemesis, Brad. He also doesn't think much of Smiley, often making sarcastic remarks. Your assistant, Gerda, gets you your jobs and basically alerts you when you're losing health during the game (it gets annoying after a while, as you'll see below).

You end up adventuring through three issues each of three different comics: a fantasy-based one, a Silver Age 60's era comic, and Manga!. Thus, you essentially have nine levels after the intro level. Then you have one final level to get through, making ten in all.

Let's start with the good.

The humour, while crude at times, is often hilarious. One of my favourite lines, uttered by Brad, I'm using in my sig in the forums: "If I wanted any crap from you, I'd squeeze your head." That surprised me the first time I heard it, and the wife and I just burst out laughing. While crude, there really isn't any bad language, with the worst being a couple "asses." The humour has a little innuendo as well, but a large part of it is making fun of the genre Smiley is adventuring through. What's even funnier is the conceit that Twisted Pixel is actually helping Smiley do this, and there are live-action shots of the Twisted Pixel guys interacting with Smiley. You can purchase an item that will have the Twisted Pixel guys remove all the enemies from the screen when you hit the "Y" button, for instance.

The game will constantly keep you amused, making fun of everything from the misogyny of Silver Age comics to the warlord that you're supposedly helping in the fantasy setting. Named Nanoc, he coincidentally speaks in an Austrian accent.

It is a coincidence, right?

The gameplay itself is basically side-scrolling shooting, with a few scenes of side-scrolling fisticuffs, a couple of "hit the right button at the right time" sequences, and some sequences where the enemies are in front of you popping up and you have to move your aiming reticule to shoot them. All pretty good, right?

Actually, it is.

And frustrating as hell, too.

The difficulty level in Comic Jumper is through the roof, and for a couple of reasons.

First, your gun is vastly underpowered. Enemies take tons of shots to kill, for the most part, and when you're getting swarmed, that can make for some tense moments. Natives are running at you in droves, vultures are flying as your hanging from a walkway, Bradbots are flying and running at you, shooting at you. You'll get hit a lot, and eventually die. This is why Gerda's health warnings get annoying: they happen all the time!

Which is fine, as you slowly make your way through the levels, getting to checkpoints with almost no health, so you can try it out before dying and restarting at that point with full health.

Sadly, there are places in the game where the checkpoints are *really* unforgiving. You get through a really tough sequence, having died multiple times, and you think "ok, I won't have to repeat that again" when you get to a boss battle.

But no. You die during the boss battle and have to repeat all of that AGAIN.

A few times, I wanted to hurl my controller through the TV, if I hadn't just bought the darned thing.

(one of the bosses in the Manga comics)

That being said, you do learn the patterns, just like any old-style platformer/side-scroller, so you do it again and again and again, getting a bit further each time, as you remember where the enemies are coming from and what you have to do to defeat them.

Which brings up one final frustration, and maybe this just means I'm jaded from "modern" gaming.

Yes, there is no "save" function. Once you're in an issue, you're in it until you're done with that comic and back at your base. No matter how much progress you've made in it. Got stuck on a boss battle and you have to go to bed?

Tough. You quit now, you have to go through the entire issue again. You can stay up all night if you have to.

Thankfully, none of them are *that* difficult. But do make sure you've got time to finish the level, or you might as well not waste your time. This is not a game that you pick up for a few minutes of quick gaming while you're waiting for the wife to get dressed.

You can purchase upgrades that will boost your weapon damage, health, and punch power. You can also purchase collectibles that you can then look at (comics, audio files, video clips, models, etc). These are interesting looks into the behind the scenes stuff of the game, including promotional artwork and interviews with the designers/voice actors. Buying this stuff will add a small percentage increase per item to the money you earn in missions and challenges, which does make them useful.

You can even get an achievement for buying everything there. Too bad Twisted Pixel made it so cumbersome to buy this stuff, making you choose everything one at a time, with a 3-5 second animation for each one. Doesn't sound like much, does it? But when you have 160 audio files, 25 comics, 25 models, and lots of other stuff, that can take a *long* time.

Don't let the complaints get you down, though. I loved a lot of the touches in the game, like the black & white Manga where you side-scroll from right to left, the art palettes in each genre that perfectly match what they're going for, and many of the jokes. Yeah, some are groaners, but others are simply hilarious.

If you like side-scrolling shooters, comics, and crude humour, you might want to consider getting this game. If you only like two of those three, wait until it becomes a Deal of the Week or something, but you should still get it.

It's a lot of fun, though finger-grindingly frustrating at times.

*postcript: Also, if you're a fan of Twisted Pixel's "Splosion Man," you can "purchase" a couple new levels for the game with the money you earn as Captain Smiley! That might make it worth it just for that. If I had that game, that is.

Arcade Gaming Shrine - an excellent song about old-school video games

Regular readers of this blog know that I'm a big fan of Dan Americh, even since he's gone to the dark side over at Activision.

One of his side projects, just for fun, is Palette-Swap Ninja, something he does with a friend of his, Jude Sutton. Taking actual songs and creating video game songs out of them, with both Jude and him playing the instruments and Dan singing.

Here's the wonderful song Halo (All I Play-Oh), which I include here because it seems appropriate with Reach just having come out (sung to the tune of the Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Snow (Hey Oh)"):



One thing I love about this is that they always try and keep not only the cadence, but also the rhymes themselves consistent with the original song. The "Viva Pinata" song is based on the old Pina Colada song ("If you like pina coladas, getting caught in the rain...")

But the reason for this post is because they just released a video for their latest song, "Arcade Gaming Shrine."

This song speaks to any old-time gamer, with so many blasts from the past that I almost cried with nostalgia.

Ok, I didn't almost cry, but I *did* relive some old video game memories. Everything from Elevator Action to Pac-Man, Defender, Zaxxon, you name it, it's in there.

Us old farts probably will get the most out of it, but it's a good song even for those youngun's out there.



What kind of video game memories does it bring back for any of my high school friends? (Yeah, like they're reading this LOL)

Here's the page on the Palette-Swap Ninja site where they talk about how the video was filmed. A lot of the people dancing in the background (as well as featured in a shot or two) are from one of my favourite video game podcasts, "Talk Radar".

It's a treat, and I hope you old-time gamers, like me, love it as much as I do.

In-game advertising. Hate it? Or REALLY HATE it?

Activision's Bobby Kotick has been taken to task (Ok, that's putting it mildly) for a lot of the things he's said. It's funny how nobody ever broadcasts the things he says that most gamers actually agree with.

One of those statements is in regard to in-game advertising.

I was catching up on the One of Swords podcast (Dan Americh's Activision podcast), and in one of the episodes, he mentioned this when talking about Kotick's statements at a Merrill Lynch event back in September. While this statement was endlessly talked about:

""Bungie are a very unusual company. They're probably the last remaining high quality independent developer."

This statement wasn't really talked about much:

"There was a time where we thought advertising and sponsorship was a big opportunity, but what we realized is our customers are paying $60 for a game or paying a monthly subscription fee and they don't really want to be barraged with sponsorship or advertising," Kotick explained.

"So being very respectful of our audiences, unless it's something that's really authentic and will enhance the game experience, we're generally not going to include something in the game. There may be future opportunities where you might offer a consumer an advertiser-supported experience so they wouldn't have to pay for it. 

"But as long as our audience is paying $60 for a game or a subscription fee I think we're going to limit the amount of advertising or sponsorship incorporated into a game."

I would have thought that would be bigger news.

See, I *hate* in-game advertising, even as I realize that in this day and age it may be hard to get around it. I really disliked the blatant Verizon and Energizer advertisements in Alan Wake, though I do understand the need for it (the "Can you hear me now" joke was a bit over the top, though).

That being said, I don't mind it if it's in context, partially because I also don't like the way films and games get around not using product names.

Have you ever noticed some movies that didn't sell in-movie advertising to a company, where the family is sitting around a table drinking "Cola" rather than Pepsi or Coke? Or at a bar where they're drinking "beer" rather than a brand of beer? Or, in movies and TV shows, I really hate those soda machines that just say "COLA" or "SODA" on them, rather than being Coke or Pepsi. I find that distracting too. It's just a needless reminder that this isn't the real world, which can harm the immersion I like to feel in the story.

I also don't like "fake" ads, like those used in some sports games. That just pulls me out of my suspension of disbelief too, as I no longer feel like I'm playing as the Steelers or as the Iowa State Cyclones in the real world.

Wow, I sure am picky, aren't I? So what do I want in regards to advertising in games?

1) I want in-context ads

If you're playing a skateboarding game, I would expect ads for skateboarding stuff, or stuff that is inherent to the skateboarder culture (since I'm not in that culture, I have no examples). Or I would expect to see beer advertising, as well as other advertising, at sports venues.   Considering how often you're using batteries in the game, I guess Energizer was fine for Alan Wake, but this brings me to my next point...

2) Don't throw it in my face

I really hate it when, in a movie or game, the camera suddenly does a close-up on a product, so that the brand name of the product is prominently displayed for 3 seconds or so, before moving on. Can you make it any more obvious?

Or maybe a cop standing over a dead body says to his partner "I'm going to call this in on my Nokia SC-2000 Smartphone that has everything from a 2000 mega-pixel camera to a holographic projector! Hey, why don't you check his pockets while I'm doing this?"

Background advertising, where you can clearly see the Apple logo on the computer (but the camera isn't intently staring at it) is great! I don't mind that at all. But don't make it so obvious that the viewer/gamer just rolls the eyes.

3) Don't overdo it

This can be context-sensitive too. Sports venues have a *lot* of advertising, so it might be a little more understandable in a sports game. But don't have 5-10 different sponsors for your 10-hour game, throwing blatant product placement at me right and left. I want to enjoy your game, or watch your movie. I don't want to have my head reeling because of all the advertisements being thrust upon me at once.

Did you ever see the movie Wayne's World?

They did a wonderful parody of the overpowering product placement in movies that was taking place at the time, all while getting that same product placement in the movie!

 

 

If you're going to do it, why not have fun with it?

I realize that this is all pie-in-the-sky stuff, and that I will never be totally satisfied. In-game advertising is here to stay.

But I love that somebody as powerful as Bobby Kotick has come out against its overuse.

Ummmm, on second thought, can we get another advocate please?

Thank you.

Are you a gamer? Are you lonely? Here's something that might help

Yes, fellow gamers, GameCrush has launched!

This service allows you to play your favourite games and have some female companionship! Unless you're married, of course, in which case the female companionship you're actually getting is probably complaining about you playing games instead of painting the living room or something.

I kid! I kid! That's a dirty stereotype that I'm not going to propagate. Too late? Oh, ok. Never mind.

Anyway, Gamecrush lets you play games with women who are also playing your games, allowing you to talk to them while you're playing, socialize with them, or whatever else you want (and whatever else they're willing to do). You can play everything from Facebook-style social games to Halo Reach, and talk to a cute woman while you do so!

And ladies, you're not left out. There are some male "play dates" on there too, for your playing pleasure.

According to Mashable (my favourite tech and social media blog):

"Users of GameCrush have four basic options for making connections with PlayDates. The Arcade is for casual gaming, The Arena is for serious gaming, The Academy is for learning “tips and tricks” from PlayDates and The Edge is this service’s version of a red-light district.

There is a catch,of course. PlayDates don’t crush their controllers for free; it costs
$0.60 per minute to have a pretty girl sniping with (or at) you."

Yes, this is a pay service (you didn't think you'd be getting this for free, did you?). And how much do you want to bet that, eventually, "The Edge" will cost more than the other areas?

However, it can be pretty lucrative for those PlayDates, who can get paid $20+ an hour to play with these guys (I don't know if the male PlayDates make anywhere near that much). It can all be good, clean fun, or it can be a bit more edgy and adult (though doing that while playing Call of Duty just seems...odd). I guess you can tell what type of woman you're getting from the PlayDate name and the picture provided, eh? (I guess this is where I should warn you that a couple of the profile names, and a *lot* of the PlayDate pictures, aren't necessarily safe for work)

The way it works is that when you find a PlayDate, you invite them to join a game (on the site, I assume). Once they accept your invitation, you hook up in a video-enabled chat session. If you're playing a game on a console, I suppose you have to be sitting at your computer so you can take part in the web cam session while you're playing the Xbox (or whatever) game on your TV. You join on Xbox Live, PSN, or wherever you're playing the game.

Note: This does not work *through* the console's online network, and isn't affiliated with any of them whatsoever.

Ok, all of that being said, what does it say about us as a society that something like this might become popular? Are we turning into a world of shut-ins where we get our jollies at home rather than going out and meeting new people?

I said in an earlier post, back in May, when this was only in Beta:

"Would I have done this if it were available when I was single (and if I
had been playing games back then, of course)? I don't know. I might have
tried it out. It not really *that* much money (the equivalent of buying
a woman a drink at a club). However, I can see it becoming as addictive
as any of those chat lines where you pay $3.99 a minute to talk dirty
to some other hot babe ("hot babe" in Fantasyland, anyway). It might get
really expensive, really fast. "

Honestly, my opinion hasn't really changed. I guess this fulfills the same adult niche that those chat phone lines fill, only for gamers.

But I still think it's sad.

What do you think? Do you think it will be enormously popular?

You don't have to say whether you'll use it or not, though you're more than welcome to!

(Note: Some people may find this post familiar, as I did post about it back in June.)

Video games responsible for pets run amok?

Yes, now you can blame video games for your pets going berserk.

Don't believe me? See this article from the Daily Mail in the UK (h/t: Games Radar) that reports on a 9-year-old girl in the UK whose lip was bitten off by a bull mastiff, allegedly because the dog heard another dog barking. Megan Walker was playing Nintendogs on the Nintendo DS at the time, and I guess her dog was barking, setting off the vicious attack.

According to the Mail:

"Megan Walker's family say a friend’s bull mastiff cross went berserk when it heard barking on a Nintendo DS game.

It dragged Megan, nine, off a sofa as she played the virtual pet puppy game Nintendogs.

The dog sank its teeth into her face, bit her several times and ripped off her top lip.

Quick-thinking police officers put the piece of lip on ice and surgeons were able to sew it back on.

"I think this game should carry some kind of warning,' said the girl’s grandma Jean Taylor.

'People should be told not to play it when there are dogs in the room.  I blame the game for what happened to Megan. If they hadn’t been playing it I don’t think the dog would have gone for her.'"

Really? Is it really the game's fault? If the bull mastiff was set off by the barking in a video game (I've never played it, so I have no idea how "realistic" the sounds are), wouldn't the dog be set off by the sound of *any* dog barking? Sure, if the barking's outside, the dog won't necessarily attack a person. But it sure would be a good indication that something's wrong with the dog, wouldn't it?

People should know their dogs enough to realize that there might be a problem. Megan was apparently at a friend's house. Shouldn't that family have known that the dog would be set off by barking? Or are there so few dogs in the neighborhood that it's never been an issue before?

No, I'm not necessarily blaming the family here (though I know it sounds like it). What I am saying is that it's ridiculous to blame the game, especially to the point of saying "there should be a warning on the game!" (At least Grandma isn't calling for an outright ban on the game...there's a first!).

I do think that, if you own a breed of dog that is known for violent actions (pit bulls, etc), you should be more aware of the personality of your dog, especially around other people. They may be trained well to respond to you, but what if you're not there? Should you make sure your guests are aware of things? Or just make sure you never leave your dog alone with guests?

Incidentally, I love how they slide this little tidbit in to the end of the article:

"Ms Melville was unavailable for comment, but it is understood that she told police that Megan may have kicked Saracen and that is why he attacked her."

Gee, wouldn't that change the complexion of the entire story? But no. Let's sensationalize the game aspect instead.

Colour me not-surprised.

Grandma's buying me an M-rated game!

During my recent trip to Iowa, there was a hilarious incident that I feel I must share.

The wife and I were at a local shopping centre, and she wanted to look at some clothes. There was a video game store just a few stores down, so rather than hover over her while she looked, I decided to head down there just to see what was happening and to browse around.

After telling the two guys there that no, I'm from Canada, so pre-ordering Halo: Reach there would be counter-productive, they left me alone. I was just looking at all the titles they had, seeing if there was anything I wanted to pick up, when a young kid (maybe 12?) came in with an old woman; obviously, Grandma was taking the kid video game shopping!

I was the only other person in the store, so I listened a bit while the two guys (obviously bored, so happy to try and sell something to anybody) talked to the new customers. They talked for a bit about other game suggestions, and then the kid blurted out "What about Mafia 2?" My ears perked up and I listened more intently.

Now, for those of you who don't know, Mafia 2 is an M-rated game about the Mob in the 1950s. There's lots of swearing and bloody violence in it. I'm not sure if there's nudity in the actual game, but one of the collectibles is 50 Playboy magazines from that era, complete with centerfold.

To the guys' credit, they did warn the customers about that, in detail (mentioning everything, including the Playboys). There are no ERSB (Entertainment Software Ratings Board, the organization that rates games so that parents know what's in them) issues because Grandma's there, of course. While they weren't actively discouraging the kid, they were pointing out everything that could be potentially harmful so that Grandma could make an informed decision. (This included me chiming in and showing my ignorance of 1950s Playboys, when I said that you don't necessarily see everything, and one of the guys said that no, some of them you do actually see everything...see how innocent I am?)

Anyway, they talked about having seen the demo for the game (which includes 5 of the Playboys, actually), and Grandma asked where the kid had seen that. He said over at a friend's house (great friend!) as it's available for download on Xbox Live.

The following sentences (paraphrased, because they are from memory) actually came out of Grandma's mouth during the decision-making process.

"He's probably heard and seen it all before."

"Maybe your dad can play it with you." (or maybe it was "before you," as in he can check it out, I can't remember)

"Don't tell your mother." (to which the kid replied "I'll play it at your house!")

This, of course, kind of contradicts the "don't tell your mother" comment, unless she expects Dad to keep it secret too.

Grandma happily bought the game for her grandson and they walked out the door. She was very uncertain the entire time (or seemed to be, anyway), but ultimately she decided to do it.

After they left, the three of us just burst out laughing, with one of the guy's saying "I wish I had a grandma like that!"

To be honest, I was quite shocked. Granted, it was a different age (I am 40 now!), but not only would neither of my grandmas even have considered buying me this game at that age, they would probably have been actively disappointed if they discovered that I was playing it after having got it through some other means.

After leaving the store and meeting up with the wife, I told her the story, and we had a laugh. It is funny.

But it's also sad, in a way.

Blood Bowl - Oh the Memories!!!

During our recent trip home, I bought two games: Prototype (which I haven't played yet) and a game that I've been playing almost non-stop since we got home, Blood Bowl.

Obviously, this post is about Blood Bowl because I haven't even played the first one yet! Oh, yeah, and there's that whole "blog post title" thing too.

Blood Bowl is a video game based on the long-running board game of the same name. I used to play it with a friend of mine back in grade school or junior high, so you know how long it's been around!

It's set in Games Workshop's Warhammer universe, but this is a game of football, not role-playing fantasy battles or anything like that. And when I say football, I don't just mean the football you're all familiar with (though there are a couple of elements that are the same).

No, I'm talking about no holds barred, smashmouth football where a team will do anything to get into the end zone. And I do mean anything.

It is called "Blood" Bowl, you know.

Basically, you have a team of various races (dwarves, elves, goblins, orcs, Chaos warriors, rat-man-like Skaven, etc), and you're trying to get the pig's bladder (that's in the shape of a spiked ball) through the other team and into the end zone.

One team kicks off to the other, and then tries to defend their goal. There are Linemen, Blitzers, Throwers and Catchers on the team (some other races' teams have a few different kinds as well). You can also have big creatures like an ogre or troll on your team too.

Blood Bowl is a violent sport, however. You're trying to knock the other team's players down to give you a clear path to the end zone, and if you happen to gouge out an eye (forcing the player to miss the next game) or break an ankle, oh well! Oh, and don't forget that you can kick the other player while he's down, causing further injury. But be careful if you haven't bribed the ref! You might get sent off the field.

The original board game was turn-based, with each game having 16 turns (8 turns comes up to halftime, where the players switch sides and kick off again, just like real football). The video game adds a real-time mode, but I haven't tried that yet. To me, Blood Bowl is turn-based, so I have no interest in trying that one.

Each player can move a certain number of squares, and each player also has a "tackle zone" that consists of every square around him/her. If somebody tries to leave your tackle zone, even just to go to another square in your zone, they have to make an agility check or be knocked down, ending your turn.

I'm having a blast playing my Asgard Assholes human team (the name just seemed to fit the atmosphere of Blood Bowl) in a campaign to reach the ultimate competition! The Blood Bowl itself. I'm playing in various tournaments to try and build up my prestige as the season goes on.

So how is the video game adaptation of this game? It's actually pretty good, though there's no way I would have paid $60-70 for this (I bought it for $20, as it's an older game). The graphics are decent, though I do wish there was a bit more variety in the various fields. I also wish there were more varied touchdown celebrations. Each race has its own, but it would be nice to see more within each race.

Don't get me started on the "announcers," though. They don't really comment on the game too much, and when they do it's pretty generic. They're also very hard to hear, though I suppose I could explore turning down the game noise to hear them better. That being said, I generally just turn my TV's volume down as the sound effects are pretty basic too. Finally, the music outside of the game itself, when you're looking at your roster or hiring other players, is repetitive to the point of madness.

Then again, maybe Blood Bowl is an agent of Chaos and that's what it's supposed to do!

The presentation is fairly lackluster, though you can track your individual players' stats, as far as knockouts, casualties caused, casualties sustained, etc. You can also keep track of your team's stats.

The names of your players are pretty generic too, though there has been a bit more variety as time's gone on. I went ahead and renamed them all myself, as I had Akhim the Fool and Akhim the Gifted on my team. I was getting confused. (no, not really, but it was boring).

I will also admit that the tutorials are terrible. If you have no familiarity with the game itself, then they certainly won't help you. It even took some time for me to get the hang of things.

However, what the game does do is bring back my memories of the board game. The game itself is still being played, and maybe current players will find the video game lacking (it certainly got lukewarm reviews, though I don't know if any of the reviewers had played the board game before). However, for somebody who hasn't played it in years, this video game is a shot in the arm.

Who cares what the pundits think? I paid my $20, and I'm having the time of my life.

How much gaming is too much?

Is it bad to play games for...3 hours a night? Ten hours a week?

How about 20,000 hours in 5 years?

A gamer is suing NCsoft, makers of Lineage II, because he became so hopelessly addicted to the game that he couldn't function.

Craig Smallwood claims that NCsoft never warned him that it could be that bad, and that they should pay him for it.

"Hawaii-resident Smallwood played Lineage II for more than 20,000 hours between 2004 and 2009, during which time he became 'psychologically dependent and addicted' to the game, according to court filings posted by Wired.

NCsoft, however, 'never gave [Smallwood] any notice or warning of the danger of psychological dependence or addiction from continued play,' according to the case. 

A Hawaii judge recently threw out some of Smallwood's claims, but refused to dismiss the entire case, and let it proceed on claims of negligence, gross negligence, and negligent infliction of emotional distress."

Can you believe this? Twenty thousand hours in 5 years? That amounts to almost eleven hours a day of gaming...in the same game. Does this guy work? Eat? Sleep? Or does he fit the common gaming stereotype of being in Mom's basement, just gaming away?



Smallwood was evidently banned from Lineage in 2009 for allegedly taking part in an elaborate "real-money transfer" scheme (which I guess is a no-no in the game). When he was banned, he claims he was "unable to function independently in usual daily activities such as getting up, getting dressed, bathing, or communicating with family and friends." Did he do any of that anyway?

This judge is an idiot. Smallwood wants $3 million, and the judge lets this go ahead?

But wait, it gets better!

Do you know why Smallwood claims he was really banned? It's not for trying to make money off of the game. Oh no!!!!

Smallwood says that "NCsoft's real motive was to get users locked out of Lineage II so they would upgrade to its new release, Aion."

Yep, it's all a marketing ploy!

Have you heard reports of mass Lineage banning? I know I haven't.

Is it just me, or is this insane? If you have an addictive personality, you will get addicted to games like this. It's not the game's responsibility that you can't control yourself! It would happen with any game, not just Lineage. How many people are addicted to World of Warcraft? Even if they are, I doubt they spend 11 hours a day playing it. Ok, they may do an eleven hour session of the game, but to average eleven hours a day?

That's your obsessive issue, not NCsoft's.

Who's the bigger idiot: Smallwood or the judge? Personally, I'd say the judge. Smallwood sounds sick (I'm not denying his need for therapy and his emotional disturbance based on being addicted to the game; I'm just denying that NCsoft has any obligation to warn people about it), but the judge is supposed to be sane and he still came up with this ruling.

Are we going to start getting warnings similar to the ones that are on games now about seizures?

"Warning: play this game at your own risk. We don't know what risks those may be, but anything can happen when you play this game. So watch out."


Has it come down to this?

Guys like this just give us gamers a bad name. There have been so many posts on Game Informer Online lately complaining about being insulted and teased by other people because we game (just read at least one today!).

It's hard to fight it when guys like Smallwood are out there trying to make money off of it.

(h/t: Fox News' Red Eye show)

Iowa State Football Blog

For those of you who may be interested, I'm going to be blogging my NCAA Football 11 Iowa State Dynasty. The blog is going to be reported as if the team is being covered in the newspaper, so the articles will be game recaps, recruiting news, stats, etc.

I welcome comments, of course. Whether it's about the results themselves, suggestions, tips, or anything else you might want to leave.

Otherwise, just sit back and watch me take the Cyclones to the National Championship. You know it's going to happen.

It's simply titled "Dave's Iowa State Dynasty" so it should be easy to find.

Hopefully the new blogging features that EA has added to the game will help me keep up with the blog. We'll see how long it lasts.

Let me know what you think!

(and yes, I realize that of my potentially regular readers, there's probably only one person interested in this, but who knows how somebody may find this blog?)

8/15/10: I've taken down the blog, for a number of reasons. First, I'm kind of over-extended, so while it was kind of fun, I was having trouble keeping up with it. Secondly, since nobody's reading it anyway, what's the point when it feels more like a chore to do anyway? If it was being read, then it might be a fun chore. But it wasn't, so it wasn't a fun chore.

Now I can go back to playing the game just for the sake of playing the game.

And yes, that means that this officially lasted about a week or so.

Yay, me!!!